You Can Run, But You Can't Hide

Your treats, that is.  At least, not in this house.  Sometimes, I buy myself something special.  Not for the hoi-poloi.  Somehow, the madding crowd seems to find my treats, no matter how cleverly I hide them.  Short of caching them in my dresser, which seems a bit extreme, my only strategy with guaranteed success is this:  Buy Fig Newtons.  I think even Tiger would turn up his nose at them—and that’s saying something; after all, this is a cat that eats canteloupe.

Out the Door

What a whirlwind couple of days!  Out the door for early morning coffee, but wanted to take a moment to appreciate a quiet house with no one up but me and the cats.  Even Henry is still curled up asleep in his kennel.

Can I Get A Cat Exorcist?

I think the cats are possessed.  Or they are part of some vast right-cat conspiracy to overthrow human rule in the Queendom.  Data:  1) Cat peed in the washer.  IN the empty washer.  (Litter boxes are clean.)  2)  Yesterday’s bizarre feline encampment in front of Henry’s kennel.  3)  Cat just found with head completely inside kitchen sink’s drain. (Note:  I did NOT turn on disposal.  Perhaps Cat has heard Bob & Tom episode of Mr. Obvious.)   4)  Previous episode with feline frontal assault on Henry.  5)  Unknown feline assailant also pees in QC’s sink, but only QC’s sink.  5)  Cat sits in corner of bedroom at night, staring at blank wall.  Hypothesis:  Demon possession of cats, possibly related in some as yet undetermined way to Denver’s on-going psychotic vortex.  Perhaps all three cats channeling Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Boxer, Hillary Clinton.  Alternate hypotheses:  Cats have joined Code Pink.  Cats suffering depression over unpaid student loans and pain of working way through law school.  Cats part of secret terror cell.  (One of them IS Egyptian.) 

Will continue to gather data and keep you posted.

What is it about Personal Hygiene and Boys?

From the uproar and the deception about teeth-brushing here at Queen1’s, one could be forgiven for thinking that the twice-daily ritual is only slightly less hideous than waterboarding.  A series of interrogatories is necessary in order to propel Max toward the toothbrush and Crest.  “Did you brush your teeth?”  “Really?”  “When?”  “Just now?  I didn’t hear you go upstairs.”  “C’mere, let me smell your breath.”  That last sally elicits an enormous sigh and an immediate about-face toward the bathroom and the dreaded toothbrush of terror.  @@  Meanwhile, the older I get, the more on the spectrum my teeth get.  I find myself flossing as I stop at red lights.

The Romans Have Pro-Life Company, You Know

The Orthodox are just reticent by nature.  Besides which, few members of the national political scene are Orthodox Christians.  While Biden, Pelosi et al. wave their Roman Catholicism around like some sort of Fast Pass at Disney World, the Roman hierarchy (appropriately) speaks up to slap them back down.  Kathryn Lopez over at The Corner has been a bit monomaniacal in her abortion focus the past few days.  Archbishop Chaput there in Denver sounds like a truly courageous and forthright apologist for the Roman position on the sanctity of life.  I wish that the Orthodox hierarchy here in the U.S. would speak out similarly, but I guess everyone would just look around quizzically and say, “Who are these guys?”